Happy Upcoming Summer 2011!

Happy Upcoming Summer 2011!

Happy New Year 2010!

Happy New Year 2010!

Happy Fall 2010!

Happy Fall 2010!

Happy December!

Happy December!

Jokes

"There are many nasty jokes about attorneys:An attorney went swimming in shark-infested waters, but didn't get bitten? Why not? Answer: Professional courtesy.Another attorney died and went to heaven, Saint Peter met him at the gate, and informed him that the Presidential Suite would be ready for him in about ten minutes, and invited him to take a seat in the waiting area. While the attorney was waiting, he saw the Pope who had just died, come to the gate. Saint Peter told him: "Oh yeah, Pope, we'll put you in Dormitory H."The attorney got up and asked Saint Peter why the Pope was getting a bed in the dormitory, while he, a mere attorney, was getting a suite all by himself. Saint Peter answered: "Well, I've got 75 popes up here, but you're the only attorney who ever made it."Another attorney comes to the pearly gates, protesting there must be an error, because he's only 38 years old, and too young to die. Saint Peter asks him to wait, while he checks his record book. Upon returning, Saint Peter tells him: :"Well, I've checked our records, and according to hours billed, you're 86 years old."Attorneys have been getting very bad press lately, much of which comes from doctors who resent being held responsible for their careless and neglect. Some people have the personal opinions that anyone who becomes an lawyer in an unethical slimeball. In reality,there are good and bad lawyers, just as there are good and bad doctors, grocers, mechanics, etc."

"Like doctors, lawyers often specialize. Some are criminal lawyers, while others do corporate law. There are family practioners, and even divorce specialists....

One point to keep in mind, though, is that attorneys bill by the hour, and that, like a taxi driver, your attorney has a vested interest in keeping the meter running. Keep this in mind at every point, because you may find it's cheaper to make a concession in your case than to spend twice as much on attorney's fees fighting it in court. Beware of the lawyer who wants to fight every minor point out in court. "

Pre-Employment Integrity Testing Practice Test Lying

"Give yourself 1 point for each of these items that you have answered True:5. As a child, I was never punished for misbehaving. T/F19. I always tell the truth. T/F57. I have never used profanity. T/F64. I have not gotten angry at anyone. T/F69. I always feel happy. T/F75. I have never done anything for which I later felt ashamed of. T/F Give yourself 1 point of each of these items you answered F:12. I have laughed occasionally at a dirty or racist joke.28. I can recall at least one instance in my life when I 'got away' with something. T/F42. I sometimes hated my parents when I was growing up. T/F48. There have been times in my life when I thought about su----. T/F If the total is 6 points or greater, you have failed the test."

This is what Charles said.

Practice Pre-Employment Integrity Testing Attitudes

"Attitudes (Give yourself one point) for each of these items you answer Yes:3. I would be upset if a friendly coworker was fired for taking home a box of paper clips. 40. As a rule, I almost always try to give people a second chance. 46. If you were the boss, would you treat a long-term employee differently from a new hire if both were caught punching the time clock for friends? 73. If I were the boss, I'd be more apt to overlook a minor incident of shoplifting if the employee were a single mother. Give yourself 1 point for each of these items that you answered N:10. I think some crimes are so awful that they require a death penalty. 16,. An employee who takes home damaged merchandise without permission should be treated just as if the merchandise were not damaged. 52. Do you think that a person should be treated like a criminal if she steals something her family really needed? 62. I believe in the phrase, "An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.'For 61. and 9 Give yourself one point if you answer anything except Fired or arrested. An employer discovers that a worker occasionally takes mj on the job. Other options. Warned. Suspended. Ignored. 9. An employer discovers that a worker has been removing aluminum cans from a recycling bin, so he can cash in on the way home. Same answer as 61. "

Charles said this. The more points a person has, the less they would be recommended for hire.